What is it within me that always seeks its own? The ego, the sin nature, the “I”?
Even though my heart and intent is to seek God, it is almost never that pure.
There is this other layer of what’s in it for me. I hate that.
I want You, Holy Spirit, to get rid of it, overcome it, kill it.
Wait, I have to kill it, don’t I? This can be only my choice.
That involves my will, making a choice, making a choice every moment
of every day to die to myself. Help me!
That is exactly what I am here to do. No, better than that. Instead of helping you I am here to replace you. You lay aside yourself and I take over. Instead of struggling to conquer self, just lay it aside. It may still be screaming in protest and full of its own agenda, but lay it down. There is no need to be stronger. You need to be weak, too weak to hold on to your own way. Lay it down and let My life and peace invade your heart, ease your mind, soothe and heal your hurts.
This will be a constant, active surrender. There is no autopilot setting. When you identify that whisper of self-seeking within, you will have to make a deliberate choice to walk away from it.
That whisper is always within the realm of possibility on this side of eternity. You live in a fallen world and are not yet fully redeemed like you will be when I bring you home. You do not, however, need to live at the mercy of that whisper that becomes louder and more insistent. When you listen to the whisper it gains strength and power until you no longer remember how it feels to live in quiet obedience and surrender. The sooner you lay it aside and send it packing, the easier it will be to live above the chaos and confusion that mixed motives create.
There is no need for shame. I remember your frailty and humanity, but because of the blood of My Son, I see you clothed in His righteousness and covered with His glory. His sacrifice and resurrection has carried away all that was held to your account by nailing it to His cross. You stand before Me free and whole, a vessel for My life and glory. Lay aside all that does not come into agreement with Me and My truth. I, alone, am worthy of defining your value.
Romans 5:8-9; Ephesians 4:20-32; Colossians 3:1-17; Colossians 2:13-14;